![]() ![]() Anytime the salient feature of a food is something other than its taste, you know it’s a joke. So why are people lining up for $9 cups of the stuff? You can make a GALLON of this stuff for less than $5. ![]() In 2015, it’s cast as a new-age, transformative cure-all-as though cultures around the world haven’t already been gulping broth to survive for millennia. It’s caveman food. We invented it just after we committed genocide against the Neanderthals. Nomenclature is one of many reasons that bone broth is a flaming pile of dicks. There are a lot more.įirst and foremost, the price. Yeah, that’s particularly offensive. So why the redundancy? Because market research shows that it’s easier to get credulous New Yorkers to pay $9 for a 15¢ cup of SOUP WITH NO NOODLES OR VEGGIES OR MEAT when you gussy up the name with a second word. Isn’t broth just made from bones always, and the only reason to specific is if you’re making vegetable broth? Yes, it is. You’re probably wondering why I’m calling it bone broth instead of just broth. We invented it just after we committed genocide against the Neanderthals. If you need more convincing, check out the bone-broth tracker. Paleo-Diet advocates have flocked to it, and the concept has quickly gained steam in the media as the “it” food of 2015. We have a new sheriff in Trendy Food town, and its name is bone broth-a soup of slow-simmered animal bones rebranded as a fortifying health beverage. bullshit, trumpeted by the type of people who need to cloak their eating disorders in the poisonous language of “wellness,” right? Think “juicing.” We all know it’s some L.A. ![]() This makes it much worse, because it’s couched in faux-scientific language that would make even L. ![]() Sometimes though, the trendy food is subtler. Not only is the new food usually just lame-ass Girl Talk cuisine (ramen burgers, Thanksgiving burritos), but it’s inevitably foisted on you by your friends who secretly take pride in being fourth-wave gentrifiers. At some point in your life, you will start to be pitched on new foods that “you just have to try.” This nightmarish period of your existence usually happens between college and children. ![]()
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |